An amalgam I am,
of the laughter and the tears
from the years gone by,
of love, of hope, of dreams
from the years to come,
a tapestry I am,
weaved together by threads
of my past and the future to come.
She is melancholy, she is my joy,
tried I have, to mend, to sew back
the broken seams of her heart.
A heart that was shattered
many summers ago.
Alas! I have failed,
My love was never enough
for there she withers away,
a little by little she dies
her laughter seeping out
through those cracks in her heart
A heart I could never mend.
In that noisy market,
amidst the heady concoctions,
of colours and hues,
of sights and smells,
of cacophony and chaos,
all I heard was silence,
all I got was a whiff
of roses and you.
That great oak in my grandma’s garden
my long lost friend,
For many a summer evening I spent
her leaves rustling a gentle music
As a dreamy me weaved dreams.
Years hence, here we stand
The great oak and I,
she looks at me sadly
And asks am I weary?
I say yes I am
Come, says she,
rest some more
dream some more.
Holding broken pieces of me, I sat
on my balcony a summer arvo
pondering about love and life
wondering where had I gone wrong
and then a cuckoo came calling.
She made herself home, confident
sure of herself, unlike me.
And then she sang a song,
a melody that pierced my heart
She took me back in time
when my hopes were young
when my dreams were blinding
when loving myself came easy.
Back to the home she flew me
the one that still stands, just empty
where love meant mom’s food
where tears were wiped quickly
where kisses healed scrapped knees.
to the fields, where her kin sang to me
on cool evenings when I wove dreams.
She looked at me, holding my stare,
striking a final tune, as if urging me
to move ahead and still look back
to still dream, to still believe
and to find in myself, the little me,
who believed a kiss healed.
Sometimes in the midst of chaos,
I hear a silence that speaks to me
that whispers of things that could be
of the magical places that await me
of strangers who do not yet know me.
Sometimes, in the road full of people
that smell of food, sweat and perfume,
I smell a magical scent, a concoction
of dreams, love and a little musk
of the sea, roses and a little hope.
Sometimes, when sleep eludes me,
I visit that universe in my mind
that galaxy of dreams in my heart
and as my lids become heavy
the last thing I notice is
that the stars of that universe
twinkle just a little bit brighter.
I walked in rain, my body drenched,
soul parched, crevices in my heart
and then I bumped into you
and the clouds parted,
The world turned golden again.
Happiness had eluded me for long
hope had died a while ago
I travelled the world searching
for what, I know not,
then I bumped into you,
and the clouds parted,
Found myself, I had, in you.
The moons of the nights
lacked lustre and shine,
the sky, dull and gloomy
then I bumped into you
and the clouds parted,
a new moon shone
full of gloss, life and joy.
In those green fields, I roam still,
holding a kite, running wild,
chasing fireflies, against the wind,
towards the sea, hope in my heart,
dreams galore, love abound.
A part of me is a child still,
there I am in my mom’s kitchen
taking in aromas of spices and love,
I still sit on my dad’s armchair
on the porch, watching a sunset golden.
There I am, listening to grandma’s stories
picking tiffs with my brother,
eating mangoes in the backyard
jumping on muddy puddles with pals,
not a care in the world
Greasy faces, rosy hearts.
Oh! the child in me is still
a part of the adult me,
egging me on to chase dreams,
to weave hopes, to manoeuvre
through the troughs and peaks
and keep on moving
towards the sea,
against the wind.
Darkness has impossible depths
and hues that deepen at each step
down the abyss that never ends
I know, for into it I plunge,
me and my sunken heart.
An incessant ringing in my ear
a silence that is deafening
Away, I urge my feet to carry me,
away from the darkness that
is screeching its way into me.
In the midst of life, I am not alive
I am broken and I am defeated
by the pain, by the silence, by me.
The abyss of darkness I am in now
with its million hues of black
seeping into the cracks of
the millions dreams I had.
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A unicorn on my daughter’s face,
a piece of face painting that I love,
for in her young heart, she believes
in unicorns, in magic , in dreams.
The unicorn will be gone in a day
but I hope in her heart it will stay
as she grows to be a woman
giving her power and faith
making her believe in miracles
helping her conquer adversities.
My little girl, never let go of magic
when dissonance hits you
find harmony in your heart,
dream on a million dreams,
and somewhere within you,
cling on to that unicorn and believe.